


You Are My Lucky Star

by coldairballoons



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: AvaLance, F/F, F/M, First work in the fandom!, Hemophilia, High School AU, M/M, Many musical theatre references, Panic Attacks, Ray is confused, Steelatom - Freeform, Theatre AU, Trans Ray Palmer, Transgender Ray Palmer, ray has anxiety
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-15
Packaged: 2020-05-01 19:07:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19183867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coldairballoons/pseuds/coldairballoons
Summary: Ray Palmer was many things. Science nerd. Musical lover. Literal ray of sunshine. And a Legend, just to name a few.What he was not, however, was musically inclined. Sure, he loved Singin’ In The Rain as much as the next person (okay, more. Way, way more.) but he couldn’t actually be in it… right?Wrong.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve had this idea in my head for so long, I can’t wait to have this on paper!!

Ray Palmer was many things. Science nerd. Musical lover. Literal ray of sunshine. And a Legend, just to name a few.

What he was not, however, was musically inclined. Sure, he loved Singin’ In The Rain as much as the next person (okay, more. Way, way more.) but he couldn’t actually be in it… right? 

Wrong.

***

“And get some sleep, Ray, you’re gonna pass out.” Sara called to him, wrapping up her post-mission speech. Which, if you think about it, didn’t usually include that. 

What the post-mission speech should have included wasn’t that warning—it should have been another. “Oh, and, if anyone should begin to exhibit signs of illness, please report to the medbay.” Gideon added on, and Sara pointed up at the AI. 

“That too. Those Nosoi were nasty little shits, don’t want anyone spreading a plague in the 21st century.” Sara waved them off to do their own separate things, per usual.

“You got it, Captain.” Ray fake-saluted, pushing away from the Waverider’s console that he’d been leaning on for the past few minutes. It was true, Ray was about to pass out. He’d been researching a way to possibly capture a siren, since a certain Brit in a trench coat was being absolutely no help, and got a bit carried away.

He swayed on his feet as he made his way to his room, stuck between being awake and falling asleep where he stood. Yeah, Ray definitely regretted the lack of sleep, and he didn’t even bother to kick off his shoes or unbutton his shirt before he face-planted onto his bed, nearly instantly falling asleep.

***

“Ray. Ray, wake up.” 

“Wh…” Ray rolled over, rubbing his eyes. He blinked once, twice, three times… 

No, that couldn’t be right.

“Nate?!” The historian nodded, rolling his eyes. The only problem was… he wasn’t Nate. Or was he? He sure looked like Nate Heywood, the only thing different was, well, he looked about 15 years younger. 

“Get your perfect ass up! We’ve got auditions in twenty minutes.” Not-Nate insisted, pulling Ray to his feet. 

Perfect ass? Twenty minutes? “Auditions…?” Ray asked, obviously dazed. Maybe he’d hit his head while falling into bed. That was it. 

Not-Nate rolled his eyes. “For Singin’ In The Rain? Just your all-time favorite musical?” 

Oh.

“This isn’t right—” Not-Nate sighed, obviously on his last nerve. “Where’re Sara? And Zari? And—“

“Sara’s in the dressing room with Ava, Zari’s backstage talking to Charlie, last I saw ‘em, and then Mick’s… somewhere.” He shrugs. “Barry was looking for you, man, c’mon.” 

“But… but… I can’t even sing!” That got Not-Nate to pause. “Why would I audition?!” 

“What are you talking about? You’re the best singer this school has seen since Sebastian Smythe.”

Ray paused. “Isn’t that a Glee character?” 

“Glee?” Not-Nate cocked his head. This was bad—Nate and Ray had binge-watched every episode back on the Waverider. “What? No. He’s the actor.”

“Actor?” Now Ray’s head was spinning. He had to sit down, he couldn’t stand. “No, no, he’s… a character.”

“You must still be asleep, bud.” Not-Nate gave him a strange look, but Ray was dizzy. 

“Uh, bathroom, where’s the bathroom?” He muttered, and Not-Nate pointed to the left. Ray stumbled to his feet, throwing open the door and leaning up against the wall.

He couldn’t look into the mirror, Ray was too terrified to even open his eyes. 

And yet, he did. 

“Oh, God.” Ray panted, and his teenaged reflection mirrored him. His hair was neatly trimmed, a difference from his regular body. He was… far thinner than he had been, with far less muscle, but his face still looked as round as it used to when he was younger. Well, Ray assumed he was younger now. 

“Ray?” He stumbled back into the wall as a certain Oliver Queen walked into the bathroom. “What’re you doing here?”

“Oliver—I, you’re so young—” Ray was messing up his words, he was on the verge of tears. “What’s going on?”

Oliver looked concerned, to say the least. “What’s going on?” 

“I can’t stay here, oh God, what’s happening?” Ray’s hands shook as he slid down the wall so that he was sitting against the tile. “What’s happening to me?”

“Ray. Ray, you’re panicking.” Oliver’s face came into focus, and he took one of Ray’s hands. His hand felt so different, not calloused and rough, but smooth. As if he hadn’t been fighting for years.

“Breathe when I squeeze your hand, okay? Just focus. You’re okay. You’re okay.” After a few moments of shaky, forced breathing, Ray could finally breathe without that pressure on his chest. 

“There you go. What’s going on?” Oliver asked once Ray had evened out. “Are you alright?”

Ray shook his head. “There’s something… terribly wrong.”

“Wrong? Is your binder acting up again?” 

Oh. That was what the pressure on his chest was. He’d nearly forgotten what binding his chest during high school felt like. 

“No, no, not that.” Ray ran a shaky hand through his hair, trying to calm his nerves. “I think… I think this isn’t real. None of it.”

“Real?” 

“I’m sorry, I can’t—I have to go.” Ray couldn’t form words anymore. “Sorry.”

He sprinted out of the bathroom, stunning Oliver. Obviously, he wasn’t used to Ray running away from him, or talking in a dazed mutter.

“Ray!” Not-Nate, well, Nate called to him. “There you are!”

“I just told you where I was going.” Ray whispered to himself, but he turned to face Nate anyways. “Hey, man.”

“C’mon. We’ve got auditions.” 

Ray looked up at the sky as he muttered his next words.

“What the hell is going on here?”


	2. Dancing Through Life

“Ray?” Nate Heywood—the real Nate Heywood—called from outside his room. “It’s Nate—you’ve been in there for hours, man, when are you gonna come out?”

Ray, however, did not answer. He was passed out, unconscious, with no idea what was going on.

“C’mon, Nate,” Zari sighed, pulling at his arm. “He’s probably just sleeping, he’s exhausted.” 

“Yeah, guess you’re right.” Nate turned, following Zari back into the control room. 

He shot a worried glance behind him as he walked away, though.

Just to make sure.

***

“Ray Palmer.” 

Ray turned to Nate—the younger Nate—with pleading eyes. “This has been great, seriously, but I don’t… know what I’m doing?” 

“‘Course you do, bud. Just go out there and sing.”

Ray’s palms were beginning to sweat, and he frantically wiped them on his jeans. “What—what should I sing?” Of course that was what he worried about. Above all other things, all other things being where his team went.

Singin’ In The Rain was classic musical style, right? So he should do something in that era. My Fair Lady, Music Man, Sound Of Music, An American In Paris, Hello Dolly… or maybe something more contemporary. Chicago. Phantom Of The Opera. Les Miserables. There were too many options.

But Ray quickly unlocked his phone, scrolling through the convenient list of instrumental tracks in a folder until he found… aha.

He plugged his phone into the speaker onstage, clicking play, and crossing his fingers for the best. Nate smiled, and gave him a thumbs-up from the wings, and yet, somehow that made him even more terrified.

“Hi, my name is Ray Palmer, and I’ll be auditioning for the role of Don Lockwood.” 

Ray inhaled sharply, tapping his foot along with the beat of the first few chords. This was just pure instinct, it was like his body was on autopilot.

He wasn’t going to complain.

“The trouble with schools is, they always try to teach the wrong lessons.” Oh, GOD, was that his voice? Since when?

Ray grinned over at Nate. “Believe me, I’ve been kicked out of enough of them to knoooow~”

“They want you to become less callow, less shallow.

But I say: Why invite stress in?

Stop studying strife, 

And learn to live… the unexamined… liiiiiiiiiiiiife.”

Ray looked over anxiously, but Nate was nodding from the wings, grinning. “You got this.” He mouthed, and Ray grinned, thankful.

“Dancing through life, skimming the surface, gliding where turf is smooth, 

Life's more painless for the brainless

Why think too hard

When it's so soothing?

Dancing through life, no need to tough it

When you can slough it off as I do

Nothing matters

But knowing nothing matters

It's just life

So keep dancing through,”

The music stopped, and Ray smiled awkwardly. “Thank you.” He slightly bowed, unsure as to what to do, but Nate pulled him offstage, grinning, and pulled him into a hug.

“Holy shit, dude, that was amazing!” Ray hugged him back, obviously confused.   
“I don’t know where that came from, in all honesty.” Ray admitted, laughing awkwardly. “I didn’t know I could sing like that.”

Nate laughed, patting his shoulder. “You’re great. Think I could audition for Cosmo?”

“Are you kidding? You’ll be great, pal!” Ray grinned.

It was like he was falling into the routine, as if he and Nate had been lifelong friends.

He didn’t mind. In fact, he loved it.


End file.
